school...

I can't wake up in morning..
my head so pain...
maybe is yesterday drink too much,...
i keep my feeling.,..
then having some nap at my class..

my head was so so pain...
today..
teacher say about the topik that i am intested...
that depression...
i very scare i will get that sickness...
cause many of the reason and the effect i get it...
such as cannot sleep,will think a lot,but won share out...
haiz...
the effect of the sickness is will in mention center or will commit suicide suddenly...
i very scare,...
but i think i won...~
i want be strong...

i am so in stress..
anyone understand that?
i am so xinku...
just can drunk myself...
haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

agh~!

This feeling come back again...
he give me a call when i was having dinner with my boss them...
i can't say what cause many people beside me...
=X

So...
i just can say some...
He call me by so suddenly..
i shocked...
but i am so happy...~
Why m i still happy?
i should give up...

After eat i give him a msg,
ask that anythings?
he say...
he just wanna ask me whether i m fine or not,
he is worry about me...
....................
i am happy but i sad & feel hurt more...
why don't he just leave me alone?
Suddenly i feel that i am so childish...
Why don't me just let myself freedom?


Just beer can help me sleep...
@@
start that kind of life...
i getting fat...

haizya

Today i saw him at indoor...
at first he ask me got go indoor or not,
i say maybe cause i want find my brother...
then after that...
after i work i go for find my bro,
i msg back him..
tell her whether i am in indoor now..
then he ask me whther want meet or not...

i want to see him,
but i don't want he see me....
cause i am not really okay now...
My stomach so pain & something shock me...
I go inside indoor for a while...
then when i recieve my bro fon,
wake up want go out...
i see nothing but my eye was open...
t_____t
This really scare me...
I am so scare now...

& after a few second it become normal..
i say want meet he don't want anymore...
he was with his friends...
=X
sad...but what i can do?
i think so long whether want meet him or not;...
but when i decide...
he don't want anymore...


BUt before i go home,
i go front door there...
i saw him...
but i act not see him...
then i go away...
go the wrong way...
my brother just bhind me...=.=
then go back with him...
i see that he is looking at me...
my stomach so pain...
but i still acting normal...
@@

Then he msg me start cold again...
i am sorry to my body...
i use beer drunk myself again...
i can't sleep...
2moro gt work...
i need drunk myself...
smoke is nice?
why many people moody want to smoke?
i feel want to try...
but can i?

I though he will ask me to don't give up...
but he don't...

he ask me to give up...
..................................................


nothing i can say...
i just can accept what he say....
cause i want he blissful...

=X

Yesterday night i was so happy...
that is the day that he ask me for a call..
guess what?
he want to call me...
but at night d...
he whole day so busy...
but at night we got talk ler...
=)HAPPYYYYyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

He say talk for fun lo...
but i still scare he too tired...
so ask whether he is tired or not...
if he is...
i can let him just go sleep i am ok with that d...
at least he dn tired dao...

We talk a lot owh...
So long no talk already...
happy...
even that just friends talk ...
but i still very very happy...
thanks !


Today i very moodness ler...
haiz..~
can someone can share secret with me?
who can?
please..i need a listener...
for sure=l
This is my sad side...
but i already post that post at my blog already...
i want to calm down...
time again...
Haiz...Why my time pass so slow?

Kong...
sorry today i say u...
i tell u already...
Stop say about him...
cause you already say pass though my limit...
i know u 3 saw my tears drop already...
first time right?
i don't hope too...
but... when i say STOP please stop it...
if can continue i won stop you...
so...
don't talk about that again...
everything is over...**

lolz

I don't know what i can say...
open school soon...
i very very moodness...
haiz...
its this the time i need to let go?
No...
i can't...
T______T

I miss everything that with you...
Why time pass so slow?
haiz...
Someone save me...

This few day ahYong keep call me...
tell me about he like me...
so?
I love him still..
do u understand?
I don't feel want get any relationship with other...
Or i just decide to stay alone...
We should learn how to be ''berdikari''
=.=

Haiz...
i am so tired now...
when i can rest?
I just want gaming gaming gaming now~!



miss youuuuuu

haizzz

If we still together yesterday will be our 2month anniversary already...
i think u already forget about that ba,
yeaterday at first i though u won msg me d,
how know at evening u msg me...
actruely i very happy d...

I know u got go parkson also,
cause david tell me he saw you...
Aghhh,
why everyone tell me ur news?
I don't want to know!!!!!
Then u msg me say you just now go parkson...
then i ask u then,
u reply me no girl see d....@@
How hurt is that?
Ohmann....

I am so prove that i still can reply u that strong...
u can change place see ma...@
what the helling i doing/?
=.=
i must be crazy...
He is happy with his friends..
See lenglui,
enjoy,
basketball...
& today they going to see the sea view...
At explanet...

T_____T
I very very sad...
at night before i go downstair i msg him again...
he say he is busy will find me again...
but i know he sure forget about it d...
so i just decide msg him that ask him dn tired & blabla...
Then he ask me m i gonna sleep?
he don't understand..
i always sleep very later d...
but he different...
he with friends he will sleep late,
but me he want sleep early...
T______T

I must is a LAME GirlFriend...
T___T
This few day he really sleep very late,
hope god can pray him don't tired dao...
& must let him happy everyday...
Thanks~!

If he happy,
i am okay with everything...
I can alone...
I almost alone at everyday...
So i don't mind anymore...
I start to love this song __ Akon RightNow..
Its so nice...

Now i think i find the way to make me won think so much...
I want to make myself busy...
busy whole day...
then tired liaw jiu go sleep...
hehe,
good way^^
But don't know why sometime very tired liaw but cannot sleep...
@@
that very xinku d...
T___T

But sooner i will be crazy inside my game ler,
but got limit la...
my mum will kill me if i fall inside game...
haiz....
What should i do?
I want a peaceful life...


I miss him...
Haiz...I know he never know...
Inside his heart,
i just his normal friends...

HeartBroke

Today is the friday,
i think he is with his friends now ba...
just now on msn i saw him online,
but he msg with me tell me he is busy...
So i use joke type to him : ohhor busy online a?
But no respond...
Haiz...
M i zhi zuo duo qing?

After that,
i go out with my sister...
Meet up king,lun & xiang...
They peii me talk,
they advise me a lot...
Thanks...!
But don't compare him to other la...
i don't care by other...
Aiyoo...but i know u all for my own good...thanks^^

Yesterday night actruely i also don't know why i so early sleep...
But i go downstair watch movies first d...
& then lay at there sleep jor,
handphone also put silent..
That's why i no hear that he call me...
When i saw that miss call,
i was so happy...
But when today i ask him anythings...he say nothing,
& he think i lie him...
@@
Haiz...maybe i lie him on that day only...
My stomach very pain,
the one way to make it non pain is sleep only ba..
sorry...

I wait your msg for whole day,
at last u find me at msn at night...
Say wanna webcam with me,
at first i don't really know and why u got webcam suddenly..
but i ask u where r u,
u tell me u at home...
I so trust u...
I wearing pyjamas still webcam with u,
but u was at your friend home...
Suddenly i feel that i m your toys...
Just your TOYS...

Let your friends see me?
see how ugly i m iziT?
=.=
No one know my feeling...!
I'm sad but i still find topik to msg you,
cause u say you gtg...
Kay fine,
after that you say u no go anymore u webcaming with ur frenz...
haiz..
i don't wanna care ANYMORE!
Teach me what i can do...
I gonna crazy for a guy?
T____T
My stomach verry pain,
but my heart more pain...
It already hurt me deep deep...

Remember thrusday i got try ask u out,
but u say u with friends...
i still say had fun...
Cause with friends will more fun ma,
u answer me that with lover also fun...
But i say back you don't have lover,
he ask me how i know u don't have?
But got also not me la...
Don't make ma sad can o not?

Give me hope,
but drops it again?
Do u know how sad is that?
U like joke but don't joke this kind of things ...please**

''Baby''
can i hear you call me that again?
T________T

He don't know my heart

Fine,
just now skype with him...
i was so so so happy~
Does anyone know?
He is so important in my heart...
I know...
My sadness just can keep inside my heart...

Yesterday night he is telling me that he is going to swim at tomorrow,
but he is alone...
So i decide to accompany him cause i don't want he boring...
And i don't want him alone...~!

Although i know it will be nothing,
and i will get nothing...
but i just know i cannot let him alone..
and i want he to happy everyday...
I miss the time...

I call him dear,
hold his hand...
walk together...
say i love you to each other,
watch he eat burger...
& every every things...

But just a word...
everything become a pass tence...
=(

Do you know?
I really can do everythings to make u happy,
i really can do ur crown...


Just now he tell me he lazy go already...
so tomorrow i will stay at home,..
haiz...
just don't know...
why m i so strong"?
i can act so happy in front of my friends...
but did everyone know'?
actruely i am so sad everyday?
No one know...
I don't want any chaser!
I want him~!
MyLord...MyLove...Henryy...
Although i know,
it will be impossible/...
but i still really to wait for u...
u never know so much i love you...
i just want stay beside you always pray and take care for u...

This blog so sad...
But how many people understand my feeling?

I miss him

Today i went parkson with my friends,
then i saw him...
when after i take salary with my friends...
he is with 2 guys...
he look happy...

I want go though him to say hai,
but i not dare...
i don't know what hapen to me...
Then after that they go for eat at mdl,
my friends also want go there...
I tell my friend say i want change lenc,
cause my eye so pain...
But actruely is i feel want cry...
i'm so sad..
that is the place that he break with me...
i hate parkson...
but infront of my friends...
i must act strong...
i know i can...
So i go in toilet with 1 of my friends,
change my lenc...

Then go out again...
i don't know how to explain my feeling...
i just know...
I hope can be with him again...
But time can't turn back...

Then after he go,
i want msg him...
but i not dare again...
i wait for he msg me...
But so sad,he don't...
so when around 8.40 i back home,
i gave him a msg...
Find a topik to chat with him...
That's a lame topik that : how is ur law test?
Haiz...
I really don't know what i can do ler...
But i am happy he ask me why dn cai him...
but i want just i don't dare...
but he say he want say hai to me d,
but i no look at him...
Sorry...
but he say nvm jor...

I am happy he care that,
but i know that just a best friend do d thing...
but i still happy...

Why i must be like this?
i know i should stop...
Seriously i need time to calm down...
but how long?
T________________T
I want him,
want him to beside me...
call me dear,
take care me...
I know everything is impposiible...
but who can teach me what can i do?
So hope,
i can change my life...

aghh

Today i make myself busy whole day,
but i still cannot forget him...
haizzzzzzzzzz!
anyone come save me?
please...

I tuition from 8.30 till 11.30...
but i no heart at tuition,..
i am so moodness...
but i am happy he find me at the noon time,
I really very happy...
but i just can act normal...
@@

For me,
now handphone is nothing...
cause i just want he call me.
i just want receive his msg...
not other...
i will accompany him till he sleep ....

I am so tired,
but i'm not tired to loving him...

@@

Holidays week...
@@
yesterday he got ask me what i want to do when holiday,
ask me got out or not...
=)
so happy man!


But i know nothing d also la,
but at less i feel that he got take care me^^
=P
M i stupid?
Sorry then...=X
This few day he keep with his friends...
can feel that he is happy without me...
@@
i am sad but what can i do?
i just can wish him happy and forever happy...
even i am sad....
But i know i m not that important in your heart ady,
even though u say we are best friends...
i know very hard...

babe,
i still love u so much..

I amos CRAZY!

Today i really gonna CRAZY!
I know he must busy at churuh today...
i miss him a lot a lot..~!!!!!!!

How can i forget him?
How can i don't love him?
How can he take care me ?
How can he come back to me?
T___________T

Now i just know,
actruely i am not that strong...
i need you beside me...

sad saturday

Today...
saturday...
a very very unexplain feeling again...
cause this is the saturday that i don't have hanging out with him...

I out with gm them,
2gther sing k...
at lun shop...
don't want go parkson again..
i got post at my blog...
I miss him much...

When night,
we having dinner...
my frenz ask about it,
when i answer my frenz shocked...
my sound change...
feel want cry...
but i can control it...
they say me strong...
but who know?
i reallly very very tired...
haiz...........


When reach home,
get mum scold..
cause i out whole day...
and then she shouted at me...
ask me what happen to me?
why this few day keep go out?
what i can answer her?
T_________T
Then i just can cry cry cry...!
Eat fever medicine make myself calm and feel tired and sleep..
haiz.....
don't know what i can say now...
i want sleep...
but i can't...
i want to make myself sleepy.........
still love you my dear..**

Appreciate

We should learn how to APPRECIATE...
this word is so important...
now i understand..

everything we should appreciate...
must appreciate!

.............

Post back to old post...
@@
8 til 13 march...
all will be there...

But i think i will back in here again...
this will be my sadness blog...

He break with me at mdl..
My heart so pain right now...
can't explain my feeling,
i can't act weak infront of my friends...
so i create this blog...